I have a law degree. It's the one thing I keep in my closet. There is really only one main good reason to go to law school and that's because you really really want to be a lawyer. Those people do exist. But the only way I think you'll know if you are one is to work with real lawyers first. it's very much a question of temperment. And that's something fancy schools generally don't teach you about. You can only find out, like you say, on your own. And law school is consuming. And it does reward fearful thinking. And the very process of being there can make it harder to know yourself if you're giving every waking minute to memorizing the 8 part Lemon Test.

Law school is the army of the middle class. It's where people go who don't know where else to go. And it saddles us with a different kind of injury or disability than a war, without having served anyone or anything but our fears.

"Aw but you must find that degree really useful?" I get asked all the time. Well, I did start stand-up in law school. And I'm making a show in which I teach all of law school in 70 minutes.

Here's the cartoon I drew to get me through the experience.

our wedding!, originally uploaded by subvert.com.

My Canadian wife and California fiancee Stacey. We will be *LEGALLY* married in San Francisco like every other couple can now be in the State.

My first call was to my Canadian wife/ California fiancee, my second to the caterer.

Free! Don't need permission! So overoyed!

The Wedding FAQ I wrote after Wedding 1.0 in Canada explaining how I feel about it all and why we are getting married twice.

20 Lesbian Wedding Etiquette tips (jokes) I wrote for Curve.

VOTE this November to ensure the constitutional amendment to save my marriage and stop the anti-gay proposition from amending the California constitution.

And too awesome to die. Can't Death swop her for someone without a fabulous sense of humour? For someone who wasn't such a presence?

There is nothing lawyerly or logical about her being gone. One day she thought she had the flu. The next day, she is gone. I can't call her up.

I wish I had a digital photo of her but I don't. All my pictures of Felicia are from just before the web….from the days when having free LEXIS-NEXIS access felt like having a secret pass to the world.

Felicia is one of the only people I've known who made me laugh every time we spoke. Damn. I just wrote "is."

When I visited a class at Northwestern Law School, I noticed her right away. She had a green flat top with the sides shaved, fishnets, doc martens laced up to the knees, and a loud, confident rebuttal to the professor. I breathed a sigh of relief and thought. "It's ok, I can go here."

We were two of very few "out" feminists in the school. I was so perplexed that there was such ignorance of and resistance to feminism in 1991, that I conspired with Felicia and a few others to put on an event to debate "Is Madonna A Feminist for Social Change?" I loved the fact that our classmates would be hearing feminism no matter what side they heard.

I edited some video from Justify My Love and we packed the room, no small feat in that small pond of apathy. Felicia gamely took the "no" side and argued it beautifully in her pink, cleavage-baring suit. The same suit and cleavage she famously put to use when meeting Chief Justice Rhenquist the year before. The woman had flair.

Felicia fell in love with a classmate John Brewer. John was known for his advocacy of the Federalist Society and his passion for Wiliam F Buckley. They were, initially, an uncanny couple. It was John, I believe, who took Felicia to a party for some conservative notable where Felicia snuck into the office, swiped Phyllis Schlafly's home number and then ceremonially presented it to our feminist professor and mentor as a gift.

We started a group called Chycks and invited the other women we knew with chutzpah to a tea with cucumber sandwiches, chocolate chip cookie dough pate and a free space to let our minds and mouths run.

Felicia had flair. She had humour. She had backbone. She thought she had the flu.

There is no time to mess around people. None. She was one of the best. Full of the joy and contradiction and brilliance of life. She could argue one side and then the other with the best of them. And oh, there always seemed to be sides. It was law school, after all. There were fights to be fought.

How could she and John be in love? How could it work? But work it did.

Love is way beyond sides.

I am older now. I am not so sure that it's important to be so sure of sides.

I just want to hear her laugh.

There is no time to waste. None at all.

I still favour a Constitutional Right to Sexual Pleasure, which I spent my third year writing up in law school. I never published it, but it will make an appearance in The Law Project.

The pragmatist in me finds criminalizing sex toys just plain funny in any state that sells vegetables.

Can I make a decision for her if, for some yucky reason, she's unconscious in a hospital?

Larry was one of my professors in law school and was the driving force behind getting Rolando Cruz off of death row and legal work and advocacy that eventually led Gov Ryan of Illinois to commute the the sentences of all prisoners on death row before he left office. 

He's a passionate teacher and a man of impeccable integrity and I only wish I'd listened to him more when I was in law school. But then I might be a lawyer today.

I am really honored by the killer group we have on the show and I know they will spark an excellent conversation for us all.

Listen to the full 90 minute show.

Which movie do you want to see? Buy or sell? Paper or plastic? Whether by prayer or Powerpoint presentation, how do you make decisions?

Listen to the mp3 of the entire show (90 min)

Add yourself to our conversation on Flickr (photos),
(chat) and Facebook
(community).

Go to Canada.

Oh it's just like the draft, except for the love part and the no killing part. And the h'ors d'oeuvres.

It's not exactly that flip. I grew up in Canada. my whole family lives in Toronto.

We've decided to have the wedding-wedding here in San Francisco where our community a year from June. We originally though it might happen earlier. But between multiple surgeries and unrelated medical school it didn't.

But we want to be legally married as well. So we're gong to do that in Toronto. Christmasi-sh-time, because that's how school holidays are organized. With some family and people to celebrate because my family are Jews and they're gonna shep naches whenever they can. You want to know why weddings are a big deal to Jews? Because it's a legitimate occasion for happiness. Those don't come often, so Jews have to cram all the happiness and tummelling they can whenever they get the chance.

And I'm their oldest child and my mum has watched her friends have weddings so finally, she gets a chance. Let me tell you. If they wait long enough, it won't matter that it's a lesbian wedding. It's a frickin' wedding. Ladyporn.

And now that Stace is going to med school (in Long Island no less) she's as good as Jewish. She gets 58 bonus mitzvah points. I thought she was going to be a dance therapist when I met her. The last thing I wanted to do was. like my mother, marry a doctor. (That's a much longer story, or play, to come later.)

I'm thrilled that they're thrilled. It was a 10 year journey with my mum to go from glum faces and anxiety attacks to "I want to make a wedding for you." She came around before it became legal in Canada, but it sure helps.

Stace's folks haven't had as long as mine to deal with this and they still live in a small town in the midwest. They're not planning on inviting extended family or friends to either wedding.

I imagine it's weirder in some ways to be a parent of someone gay than to be gay yourself. I mean when I came out, I got to sleep with cute girls. What did my parents get out of it?

So now it's gonna get to the details. This is he part that can make weddings not fun. We will plan our wedding-wedding in San Francisco fully ourselves. Celebrating after City Hall we can leave to the grown ups. My parents want Stace's folks to feel comfortable too. Who will come? How will the fun happen? Stay tuned…